i haf this feeling. a feeling i cant say. a feeling i wan so much to say. i wan so much to tell u. so much fer u to understand. but i cant. i cant say. this feeling makes me miserable. it makes me hurt inside. i wan so much fer it to go away. i need it to go away. i dun wanna feel this way.

last nite i dreamt dat i had to collect n remove worms n maggots in a certain timing. de dream was so real n vivid. i seemed to be collecting it de whole nite. got it checked up n this is wat it said:

To see maggots in your dream, represents your anxieties about death. It may also be indicative of some issue or problem that you have been rejecting and it is now "eating away" at you . You need to confront it for it is destroying your sense of harmony and balance.
In particular, to dream that you are stepping on maggots, indicates guilt and impurity. You are trying to repress your immoral thoughts or behavior . On a positive note, it may symbolize your resilience, persistence, and your ability to bounce back from adversity.

To see a worm in your dream, represents weakness and general negativity. You have a very low opinion of yourself or of someone in your life.
To dream that the worm is crawling on your body, indicates that you feel someone around you is taking advantage of your and feeding off your kind heartedness.

i did not step on it nor did it crawl up my body. actually i'm not sure if it did crawl up my body. hmm.. i noe dat this dream n its interpretation plus wats been going on this few days n de pic i've seen r more den enuff to drive me nuts.. haiz~

lol.. its been long since i last post but anyway happy 2007~ althou i'm 20 days late. hehe.

haf u eva felt de feeling of happiness? de feeling dat u r who u r.. de feeling dat u became a betta person. u've changed but u r still who u r n jus betta. living fer urself.

its him. its him i'm happy. its him i've changed. its him i'm who i am. its him i'm a betta person. its him.

its been a long time since i feel xin fu. but its different this time. i feel as if i've neva been so xin fu b4. *smiles*

i'm glad i've changed. i'm glad i've becomed a betta person. i'm glad i'm in love.

i wanna be wif u, ai ni hao xin fu.

i wanna be wif u, ai ni hao man zu.

i love u mr nyap! muackz!

i gif up.. i think i gif up.. dun think i can do this anymore.. i wanna gif up.. help~

tried to blog yest but guessed blogger's server was down.. anyway.. yest i went down to ecp had a gd meal.. its it relatively cheap since it was a turkish meal.. i dunno.. lol.. fergot to take pictures of de food!! but its ok.. its called de kebab station.. go try!! lol.. de food names were so funny like iskander or lamahcun.. lol.. but i had lamb baked rice.. n i stole some of will's iskander.. its was gd.. de dips were cool too.. n de huge garlic bread.. luckily i didnt order de ayran.. its a kind of turkish drink abit like diluted yoghurt n i didnt like it.. *phew* hehe.. quite sad dat i only haf pics of us n not de food.. but i wun mind going back dere fer a bite.. its really far.. oh.. n i lost my way on my way dere.. i walked de opposite direction.. i dunno how far i walked but i noe its jus really far.. walked by de lighthouse n abt 3 underpass.. n i had to walk back.. hehe.. walked till my ankle hurt.. but i guess de meal did make up fer it cos i fergot abt it soon after..

registered my btt today.. its on de 19/01/2007.. betta put it down jus in case i ferget.. den i spent de rest of my time researching abt wat i wanted to write.. n thinking abt some stuffs..
n i've decided finally to write on library anxiety.. toked to anders abt it.. his been a big big biiiiiiiiiiigg help! he made me more focus n clear abt wat i wanted to write..

sometimes decisions can be very hard.. especially when u hafta decide whether you wan to stay or jus walk away.. staying is not easy, walking away is hard.. so wat do u do den.. this things can be so mind boggling n frustrating.. cos when u decided u wanna stay n wait n gif it a try.. factors n other things jus come into place.. but when u made up ur mind u wanna leave.. everything is jus so nice dat u jus wanna stay.. arghhh isn't it?? oh well.. so much fer thots.. leave em fer another day..

some happy pictures b4 i go..

At ECP

kebab station-caught mich on camera admiring her cute guy!!
(mich & pris)


kebab station-pris painted her hoodie herself!! bloody adorable rite??


kebab station-will took a pic of himself when i told him to take a pic of de food.. dats y i end up wifout pics of de food.. hehe~

sometimes when people are of no significance, no matter how they are.. they will not so much as think of u.. nor will they bother.. I believed n I noe dat no matter how busy anyone can be, there will be a time.. a time where dey stop to think of their loved ones.. be it in de mist of their busy schedule.. or in bed before dey go to sleep.. I noe n believed cos I haf had people of significance.. and sometimes u jus noe u are of no significance to someone at all.. waiting is something I do not lyk to do.. but I waited.. I do not noe y I waited.. probably to see if I was of any significance.. thus I waited n waited.. you culd blatantly assess by now the ending n how much I’m worth.. but de impt thing here is.. wat do I do now?

On happier notes.. been to many outings.. too many perhaps..

had an extreme fun overnite at sentosa..

in top shop at vivo-look at em drool.. lolz!
(anders & wh)


vivo-i luurvee this fcuk sun wu kong t-shirt!!
(modeled by wh)


oppo sentosa-wow! look at de strong n mighty anders!!


oppo sentosa-omg! wh is trying to copy anders.. *sniggers*


sentosa-anders sure can slp anywhere~


sentosa's tower-look at de 3 lil monkies!!
(anders, mich & wh)


A great new hangout place i love.. call H.I.G.H.. a lan shop cum pub.. to anybody who loves lan gaming, soccer, pool n foosball!! great big projector screen to watch any soccer matches.. the computers were not laggy at all.. screen was big, graphics were gd, mouse n keyboards were gd.. this is de best lan shop i've eva been too!! n i'll be going to no other lan shop cept fer this.. this i how much i love it.. hahaz.. intro-ed by cr!


H.I.G.H- funny concoction names.. wif n wifout flash..
(irish coffee, moonwell, soubooster & enchantress)


bugis-my fav x'mas tree! wonder if dey are real crystals..

X'mas is coming!! gonna cook fer x'mas eve! so excited!!